That is why I came to a possible conclusion, maybe I should lower my expectations? I know it sounds bad, but if I were to lower my expectations, then I would not get hurt as often and would probably stress less. But I guess that is not how it works out in many cases. Also, my expectations are probably high because I am willing to do so much for those whom I care about, and I guess in return, I feel that they would do the same for me. That, is why my expectations from my friends, etc are so high, because I feel that because I can trust them, that they will not screw me over or hurt me, in any sort of way. Also, deep down inside, I keep track of those, whom I can trust, and others that I cannot trust. It all sounds so odd and confusing, but it works for me. I am a pretty friendly person and can talk to most people with no problems, but sometimes I act like I am open, when in fact, I use it as a defense mechanism. Yeah, on the outside, it seems like I am very amiable and open, but, truthfully it can be a coverup. Anyways, because of this, I have learned to shut myself off to others pretty well. Maybe it could be because I have been screwed over, so many times, and let down over and over again, in my past. I don't know why, but, I have major trust issues. For my, trust is a very important issue, and usually it takes me a lot longer to trust anyone. Those whom I consider my close or best friends are people who I know I can trust. And, even in this process, I am quite picky as to whom, I consider my friends, close friends, orВ acquaintances. Though I would never consider these people to be my close friends, I would definitely consider them as my friends. However, as I grew older, I started to come out of my shell and socialize with many different people, outside of my group of friends. I was always the type of girl who had a small group of friends, I never had a large group of friends growing up, probably because I was so shy. It's just how I have been all my life because I found friendships and relationships between family members to be of importance. When it comes to any of these sorts of relationships, I have high expectations. I change shapes just to hide in this place but im still im still an animal I change shapes just to hide in this place but i'm still i'm still an animal In your eyes i see the eyes of somebody of who could be (slow?) There is a hole and i tried to fill up with money, money, moneyД«ut it gets bigger to your hopes is always Nobody knows it but me when i slip yeah i slip I change shapes just to hide in this place but i'm still, i'm still an animal In your eyes i see the eyes of somebody i knew before long long long ago There was a time when my world was filled with darkness, darkness, darknessДЄnd I stopped dreaming now I'm supposed to fill it up with something, something, something

Jibber jabbering